Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
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