Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Never underestimate the power of titties
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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