There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I accidentally had phone sex last night
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
