all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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