can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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