Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize