I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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