You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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