how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
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