found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
