How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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