and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
It's official drugs can't kill me
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate