Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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