Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
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Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
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He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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