That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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