Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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