U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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