Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
