I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
