he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Randomize
