Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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