I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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