I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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