im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
