I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
