So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
