Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying