it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
