You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
