Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
