Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
