God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
