I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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