you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Your tits are I can't wait for
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
