i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
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