but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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