honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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