Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
