I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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