i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
