Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i came on her dog
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
