Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
