Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found the other keg... it's in the tree
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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