Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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