But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
