You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
