Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Randomize