Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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