And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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