We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
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